First off. Bic, Amy, Nelson and Tom. THANK YOU for reading my blog. It means the world to me!

And now back to the innane drivel I feel compelled to dispense.

A few days ago, Seth varied his usual wakening routine of running to my bed, whining for water, then jumping on the bed and stepping on either my face, ribs or butt. It was quite nice to not wake up with a little heel in one of those areas, to be sure. But what I woke up to was far worse.

He loves toothpaste. The kid would eat an entire tube if I would let him. This is the only reason toothbrushing isn’t a monsterous chore. So anyway…. I opened my eyes to see up to him sitting on my hubby’s side of the bed. And in his cupped hand, was a mound of blue-ish gel. I darted up as I watched him take a hearty lick of what I realized was toothpaste.

It was all over his hands, face, clothes. I got out of bed and promptly broke the resolution I make with myself daily — the one where I promise to stop cursing like a sailor. (I can usually make it at least a FEW hours before I blow it.) Because there, on the carpet, was an entire NEW tube of toothpaste EMPTY! He’d squeezed and stepped on the paste, used it to draw pictures in the carpet, and I think even rolled around in it. (It was even on his back in and his hair.) And it is not like I’m all upset about wasting toothpaste. It is just that I didn’t realize exactly HOW much toothpaste is in an entire tube. ALOT!

He walked around in it too. His arches were caked with paste. And dog hair. The vaccum cleaner was broken and there was enough dog hair in the carpet to make 5 more damn dogs!

I don’t know HOW I didn’t wake up with all of that activity. But he was pretty quiet. He usually is when he’s doing something destructive. But then again, I’d been having a nasty bout of insomnia for a few days and could very well have been sleeping a bit sounder than usual.

But anyway… bathing insued. Followed by screaming (his) and muttered cursing (me). After bathing, I went upstairs to try to fix the mess. Seth destroyed the carpet awhile back when he spilled 3/4 of a gallon of paint all over the floor, bedframe and sheets. (Long story and I think a previous entry). So a feeble attempt was made. Remaining globs were picked up and now there’s just a bunch of faint blue lines and big spots in the carpet.

My little experimental artist… If he ends up being famous someday, you’d better believe I will be expecting expensive Mother’s Day gifts like condos, trips to Europe, or diamonds. And I fully intend to let him know of these expectations at a later date. But for now, what I’ve really learned from this is that I need to start sleeping with one eye open.