In that last post, ya’ll discovered that I like to “put out” for my hubby. And speaking of such “bidness”, I pulled together a few of those magic phrases that seem to bring Marc to his knees.

Ok so maybe not so much. Maybe when I say these things it makes him wince and mentally vow to never have sex with me again. Yeah, these lines don’t work so well. But I keep trying them. I’m kinda stupid and stubborn like that. But the flip side is I guess if you want to APPEAR like you want to put out, you can use these lines. And when your hubby shoots you down then you can be all, “But I thought men wanted sex. I’m just trying to be a good honey!”

So without further ado:

The mating call of this Lisa (or lines that probably won’t get you laid.)

1.) “You’re a buffet of manliness. And I’m hungry!”
2.) “Ward, I think you need to spend some time with the Beav.”
3.) “Hhhoonnneeeeyyyy. I shaved my lllleeegggssss.”
4.) “Hey. Tonight. Me and you. What do ya say? I’ll even take my socks off. (My feet are always cold so I always wear socks.)
5.) “Hhhooonnneeeyyy. I’m hhhhooorrrrnnnyy.”

I know, I know. I’m quite the seductress. How could the man possibly resist all of the sexiness that is just oozing from every pore of my body? Especially when I say things like the above phrases?