If Yankee Candle Co. catered to cavemen
Have you ever heard of Yankee Candles? If not, let me give you the 411.
You can find them all over the place here in the Missouri/Illinois area. They offer tons of different fragrances to “stink up your house real purty”. I LOVE them.
Last night I made BLT’s for dinner. The entire house smelled like bacon. So Marc and I got to talkin’….
If Yankee Candle Company catered to the ordinary, average modern-day caveman, what kinds of scents would they manufacture? We guessed:
*Bacon (Named: “Beggin’ for Bacon Strips.”)
*Chili (Named: “Red Hot Chili Papa.”)
*Steak (Named: “Cow-a-bunga!” )
*Beer (Named: “Been beer, done that.”)
*Hard Liquor: (Named: “Liquor in the front…”)
*Pork chops: (Named: “Piggy went to market… And didn’t come home.”)
*Brauts with kraut: (Named: “Sausage Party.”)
Scents that are a bit of a gamble:
*Skanky ho: (Named: “Horny ho not fo sho”)
*Drunk girl looking to hook up as the bar is closing in 10 minutes: (Named: “Drunk-n-Desperate in dis dress.”)
Jenn on 12 May 2006 at 5:55 pm #
“Piggy went to market… And didn’t come home.” HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
AWSOME!!!
jennster on 12 May 2006 at 6:07 pm #
LMFAO! HAHHAHA
i suck off yankee candle’s , but only a few scents!
Christina_the_wench on 12 May 2006 at 6:12 pm #
*Dirty Shirt (Named:sniff - “This still smells alright”)
We have to hook up and compare scents. I am a Home Interiors - Colonial at Home - Yankee candle whore. No seriously. I could do their commercials and the hubby has talked about a 12 step program. ~evil hysterical laugh~
Lisa on 12 May 2006 at 6:29 pm #
Dirty Shirt is a GREAT addition to the line. Yankee, are you listening? heehee. A good friend of mine sells Hone Interiors. Another sells Candlelite. So yes, I understand your addiction Christine!
Linlee on 12 May 2006 at 6:51 pm #
Lisa, You are hilarious!
I have a vanilla one burning in my office right now and everyone keeps coming in my office says it smells like cake. Maybe that’s why I’m hungry all day..lol
Motherhood Uncensored on 12 May 2006 at 7:27 pm #
What about FART?
Or Clear the Room?
heh.
Red on 12 May 2006 at 7:55 pm #
That’s hilarious!
Dawn on 12 May 2006 at 8:23 pm #
New England is LAND O THE YANKEE CANDLE
and life is good.
Kirsten on 13 May 2006 at 3:20 am #
Love Yankee candles too. Have you tried Trapp candles? They might be even better. But really? What this post reminds me of? Is a looooonnnggg car trip with my family when I was 8 or so where we started naming different farts. Yes, farts. All I remember was one was a peanut butter fart - it sticks to the roof of your mouth. Now, I realize that makes no sense but I was an eight year old and my parents were helping me and my 4 year old brother name farts. It was FUNNY!
melissa on 13 May 2006 at 6:59 pm #
Oh my god, the museum’s office bathroom hangs Yankee air fresheners in each stall, vanilla, and I can’t go in there anymore! It’s so cloying and weird mixed with an old bathroom. Ick.
Um, Sausage Party? Makes me giggle like a schoolgirl.
Izzy on 14 May 2006 at 5:07 am #
lol…these are hilarious!
If they made a bacon one, I’d buy it. And I might even consider “Sausage Party”
“Beer There, Done That” might remind me too much of Spring Break circa 1987
Isabel on 14 May 2006 at 6:47 am #
So, where can I buy these at??
sunshine scribe on 14 May 2006 at 1:06 pm #
That is just too funny for words!!! ha ha ha ha
Wishing you a very, very happy mother’s day!
ruben on 14 May 2006 at 7:34 pm #
May you be blessed today! Happy Mother’s day for Ruben @ eachdaycounts.com!!!!!
Andrea on 15 May 2006 at 4:05 pm #
I LOVE Yankee Candles!
However, I think they should come out with Baby’s Butt and have the wax be layered. The Pink Layer (which will be the top 3/4 of the candle) will smell like Baby after a bath, because who doesn’t love that smell?! Then the Brown Layer (th 1/4 layer on the bottom) will smell like a diaper. When you start to smell the diaper smell, it’s time to change the candle.
Lawanda on 16 May 2006 at 11:07 pm #
hahahahahahahahaahhaaa….ahhh that was funny.