Deep Thoughts by Midwestern Mommy part 2
Why oh why isn’t it legal to shoot children with tranquilizer guns? I assume it is not. But maybe it should be? Stay with me now…
Think of all of those times when your child has been bouncing like a cracked-out monkey on your last nerve. When that would happen, instead of “losing it” and screaming at your child, you could break the glass box the gun is sitting in (like a fire extinguisher), reach in and send a little dart their way… Plus? Your child would get a good nap out of the deal too. (And maybe you would too!)
P.S. If this would have been legal when I was a child, I probably wouldn’t have been awake for most of my childhood. “The General” (aka my very high strung, nervous mother) would have had at least one of these guns and six darts in each room of the house and two in each car as well as some in her purse for emergencies.
Jaelithe on 07 Jul 2006 at 7:58 pm #
Well, I hear tell back in the fifties, they used to give the rowdy ones a teaspoon of brandy at naptime . . .
Linlee on 07 Jul 2006 at 8:18 pm #
lolo… You’re too much. Saturday we went to lunch with the family for my cousin’s birthday and she told me that she brought the wooden spoon with her so that Emma would behave…
Mega Mom on 07 Jul 2006 at 8:47 pm #
Ha! I SO needed that this morning. They were like ping pong balls trapped in an aquarium!
Mommy off the Record on 07 Jul 2006 at 8:48 pm #
Hee hee. I can see a low does of tranquilizer coming in pretty handy once in a while.
Maybe you can sell this and the car boot for a “buy 2 get one 1/2 off” deal on Amazon.com
Mommy off the Record on 07 Jul 2006 at 8:48 pm #
That should have been “dose.” whoops!
jennster on 07 Jul 2006 at 9:15 pm #
is it illegal?!? test the system. i double dog dare you. lol
Lena on 07 Jul 2006 at 10:00 pm #
That would really come in handy when American Idol is on. Yes?
Dawn on 08 Jul 2006 at 12:30 am #
I have also said that if Baby Sleeping pills were available, my kid would have started her habit on day 2. I would have been at the morter and pestle grinding those fuckers up…
Nut's mom on 08 Jul 2006 at 12:52 am #
I hope (read:pray with all my might) that NUt is a calm little bugger when he grows up. I see my friend Mamma C’s son and my friend Mari’s son and really want to shoot myself around them sometimes.
Tranqs are good….
Ranger Tom on 08 Jul 2006 at 6:54 pm #
I have to agree with you. If this were legal, I’d have been in a coma most of my childhood also!
Oblivious Maven on 08 Jul 2006 at 7:33 pm #
Where do I sign the petition for this legislation?
Pendullum on 08 Jul 2006 at 8:48 pm #
I also have this idea of a cattle prode type thing that goes around the neck or around the ankle… like those invisible fences for cattle…
I would strap said device around the neck and if they wonder off in a crowded place, or hide in one of the clothing racks, it just gives them a ‘gentle’ amount of voltage to remind them to be within 3 feet of you…
Mom101 on 09 Jul 2006 at 2:56 am #
I could buy this. And how about truth serum? I think we should actually dig right into the Batman/James Bond archives and start moving towards immediate legalization of all gadgets, tools, potions and pills.
wolfbaby on 09 Jul 2006 at 3:40 am #
ohh man this is my first time to your blog and I love it!!! You say things most mom’s dream about but few have the guts to say!!
my daughter bounces off the walls all day ever day *sigh*
Izzy on 09 Jul 2006 at 5:40 am #
My daughter gets all crazy like that right before bed time and it drives us bonkers. When the trank gun become legal to use on kids, sign me up!
Undercover Angel on 09 Jul 2006 at 6:29 pm #
LOL! Would life ever be peaceful in my zoo if I could do that… Summer holidays would be a breeze…
Mary Tsao on 10 Jul 2006 at 2:58 am #
Ha ha!
Why am I laughing? I should be crying because we don’t have those things. And I need one! Bad!