Growing up…
Throughout the years, I’ve declared many a time that on Seth’s first day of school? I would have a celebratory margarita in hand as I stood next to him waiting for that bus. I assumed I would have to restrain myself — I’d wait until he was on board the “big yellow cheesewagon” before I’d break into my little happy dance. And then I’d gleefully wonder what I’d do with that wonderful, beautiful thing called FREE TIME I’d surely acquire!
But today something happened. And I’m pretty sure the following scenario I just described? Most definitely won’t take place.
I got an introductory letter from the preschool he’s set to attend this fall. When I saw the paragraph that mentioned who his teacher is going to be, it hit me. My baby is growing up! He’s going to be in kindergarten next year. I’m NOT ready for this!
I started tearing up. I had to stop reading and go into another room. After a few minutes, I went back to read more of the letter. I didn’t even get past the info that lists who the teacher’s aide will be. I teared up and put the letter down again. It took me several trips back into the living room to compose myself before I read the entire missive.
What has really hit me is that there are so many factors I can’t control. I’ve spent most of the day alternating between fear (What if he’s a bully’s favorite target? He’s a shy, sweet soul. What if he has a hard time making friends? What if his teacher doesn’t see how wonderful he is?) and anger (”If any kid is mean to my little boy, I’m going to kick their asses AND their parents’ trashy asses! Yeah! That’s what I’ll do! I’m gonna make those people sorry they ever HAD kids!)
Really. How crazy is that?
Yes, I know kids can be mean. But he’s got alot of fun, valuable experiences ahead of him too. I just hope he’s tough enough to endure the heartaches. But I also wonder — is his sappy, overprotective momma tough enough too?
Apparently that first day of kindergarten is not only a rite of passage for kids but moms as well. (Shouldn’t we moms get a metal for that? Or at least candy or something?)
And now the only thing I’m sure of? Is that I should stock up on tissues for that first week of school. I’m going to need alot of them.
Alissa on 21 Jul 2006 at 12:07 pm #
I totally get where you’re coming from. My oldest starts kindergarten on August 9, and while he’s thrilled, I’m just getting more and more nervous/sad/astonished.
Lisa Goldstein/Kelly Kelly on 21 Jul 2006 at 1:16 pm #
Awwww. That is so sweet and I KNOW I will be the same way as much as I look forward to the free time too.
I feel for you.
Lisa
Christina_the_wench on 21 Jul 2006 at 1:26 pm #
My neighbor is a Kimberly Clark/Kleenex sales rep. Want me to hit him up for you?
Big hug. ~whispers~ Free time is a good thing. Repeat that often.
Mother on 21 Jul 2006 at 2:20 pm #
I’d be freaking out too.
They grow so fast.
Jenn on 21 Jul 2006 at 3:34 pm #
Aww hun….it’s got to be hard. I went to look at a day care center…..and they were telling me all about how they would teach allie this and that, and I almost started tearing up on the tour. =\
Isabel on 21 Jul 2006 at 4:02 pm #
Every kid in my family has a picture of us on our first day of kindergarten. And in EVERY picture my Mom is sobbing like a baby.
Let’s not even talk about how much she cried when the oldest moved away to college, or when my younger brother left for two years to serve a mission for our Church.
I don’t look forward to having Babboo grow up. But I guess they all have to.
And don’t worry-Seth will RUN that school. No need to worry about him being picked on. You’ve taught him well.
jennster on 21 Jul 2006 at 4:30 pm #
awww- it’s normal to feel like this. is your kindergarten all day long, or half day? pretty soon you’ll get used to it. but the first day is fun- all the parents are there with camera’s and it’s very exciting. make sure you take pics!
Mommy off the Record on 21 Jul 2006 at 5:35 pm #
Oh, boy. I’m tearing up just thinking about my little guy going to Kindergarten and he’s 4 years away! I so feel for you, and I agree, it’s just as big a step for mama as it is for “baby”. ((hugs))
carrie on 21 Jul 2006 at 6:38 pm #
I know exactly what you mean. I cried when the boys had their “first days”, and I am dreading 3 years from now, when I will go through it all again, kleenex and all!!
Carrie
Cheesegirl on 21 Jul 2006 at 8:06 pm #
I can see you becoming a PTA member and volunteering in his classroom. It’s so fun to see how your child is doing and how the teacher is. I learned so much from being a class mom so be sure to get involved. Oh and prepare yourself for the “drama” that goes with kindergarten! Cherish every moment!
sunshine scribe on 22 Jul 2006 at 2:57 am #
I can relate completely. I bawled like a baby on my son’s first day at JK. I get teary just reading your post.
You are right we do deserve a medal … or a giant glass of wine.
Jaelithe on 23 Jul 2006 at 12:40 pm #
Testing, testing . . . Lisa, I keep trying to comment here regarding the 29th– I’ve been trying all week, but my comments never stay! I can’t come then, but I really want to hang out with you guys. I don’t have my regular gmail email on my site because it gives my full real name, but you can try me at stellafitzgerald AT hotmail.com– that’s my secondary address (and, obviously, not my name).
I’ll try to set up a site email just for my blog later on today if I still have power, because others have had problems contacting me too, so I need to make myself more accessible.
Big Ear Creations on 23 Jul 2006 at 1:07 pm #
The cool thing is that our kids aren’t our own! Ha. We (parents) are simply fascilitators of who are kids are destined to be. We can equip them, encourage them, support them… but the best thing we can ultimately do for our kids is to release them into their destiny.
Now… I’m only 1 year removed from your situation with our oldest… so we’ll see how I feel then! Ha
Dave
leazwell on 23 Jul 2006 at 2:22 pm #
Having taught, I understand your fears. Just relax. You will deal with things a day at a time. And don’t forget, the teacher will be watching out for your son also.
wendy boucher on 23 Jul 2006 at 4:11 pm #
The best thing I did when Girlie was at that stage was talk to the teacher. Once I felt comfortable with her, I knew Girlie would have a good experience. Incidentally, I get nervous with the first day of each school year. Then I get right over it!
Stephanie A. on 24 Jul 2006 at 1:04 am #
I am sure it is going to be hard, but Wendy had a great suggestion about talking to the teacher. Just remember that you’re entitled to a bit of a breakdown for it and in addition to the tissues, be sure to have some chocolate on hand, too.
Pattie on 24 Jul 2006 at 2:48 am #
I remember my son’s first day of kindergarten…I had a lump in my throat until he turned and got on the bus…and then I cried. It gets easier, though….really.
Mega Mom on 24 Jul 2006 at 12:08 pm #
Oh yes. I cried quite a bit, but it was all good. It wasn’t TOO hard, can you believe he got OUT at 10:45 every day?!?!? This year is 1st grade and he’ll go from 8-2:30. Very strange…
Tonya on 24 Jul 2006 at 8:25 pm #
I SO struggled with the same range of emotions that you are experiencing! We made it through those hurdles, but now we are entering uncharted territory again–6th grade! New school, changing classes, lockers, massive amount of kids…
This will be a tough year all around–6th grade for Karate kid and 3rd grade for Drama Queen. Third grade just about killed us with the first born.
Excuse me, I feel a little faint. I think I need to go breathe in a paper bag.
Mrs. Chicky on 25 Jul 2006 at 3:06 am #
OMG I think I teared up just a bit thinking of your son heading off to kindergarten if only because someday my little girl will go off to school and leave me.
sniff
I feel for you. Have a margarita and then read the letter.
Becky on 25 Jul 2006 at 2:38 pm #
i dont even wanna think about hannah starting school. she’ll be starting preschool in a year and i know i will be crying my eyes out!
Heidi on 26 Jul 2006 at 1:50 am #
Something is up with Blogger and it won’t let me comment on some of your posts. Ugh.
First, you are SO normal. I’m sure I’m going to do the same thing when L starts MDO in the spring.
Second, your neighbors are concerning. Next time it happens, I’d call the police. I know it’s an awful thing to do, but someone (child services?) needs to know that his parents can’t keep track of him. Maybe they will be able to get them some help.
Mom Nancy on 27 Jul 2006 at 12:05 am #
I was weepy (hormonally pg, too), but then E1 got weepy and started crying. It was a VERY emotional first day of KG. Rob left for work and I turned the tv on for E2 and then sat down and cried.
Two hours later she bopped out of school with and ear-to-ear grin.
And it never hurts to suck up to the teacher!