This is Seth clowning around at a restaurant at the resort. Clearly, he enjoys being the only child. (Which could be the major motivation behind his recent launching of Operation: Catch mom and dad having sex to ensure my “only child therefore golden child” status.)

This is “The Hon” and “The Bun” hanging out by the bar. The boy is only four and he’s already spent quality time at a bar! (If you had any idea of where I grew up, you’d know that this is perfectly acceptable over there.) Don’t be hatin”. At least we watered down his alcoholic drinks. What? It made him sleep better. Just kidding. It actually made him belligerent and mouthy.

This is Seth and me. He’s not so happy. Why waste time posing for a stupid photo with your lame-o mom when there’s swimming to be done and women to woo? Seth totally dug this cute 10-year-old girl named McKenzie. He was all, “Hey, wanna come back to my room. I’ll show ya my new Hotwheels cars.” (I’m totally sucking in my stomach and sticking out my butt in a quest to look thinner than what I really am.)

This was Seth’s favorite spot. He LOVED eating exotic delicacies like fish sticks and fries while watching the waves lap the shore. He even took a nap out here one day. You know, after he spent all that time at the outside pool bar macking on chicks. (Marc and I LOVED drinking Coronas out here while watching the waves lap the shore — especially when the boy napped — as stepping and fetching (for the boy) seriously impedes one’s alcohol consumption.
These photos were taken before I got sick. After that, I was a cranky wench who wanted to bitchslap everyone there. Good times!
P.S. Seth is drinking a virgin drink. He’s never ingested anything remotely alcoholic in his life.