The other day I read Isabel’s post about wearing a skirt to her annual performance evaluation in hopes it would net her a good review. (She was JOKING! Seriously? I bet she kicked some performance review butt!) But just the thought behind it reminded me of a TRUE story I’d like to share…

About 16 years ago, there lived a small-town girl who was just two months away from high school graduation (and many years away from getting a clue).

She had been searching for a permanent part-time job to pay for college and auto expenses. But part-time jobs were few and far between in her wee town. So when a part-time admin position opened up in a neighboring teeny town, she was all, “Woo-hooo!” After a very strange interviewing process, she got the job.

Her boss was creepy. But he was also about 5′3 and probably weighed less than she did so she wasn’t too worried. But unfortunately, the creepy just got creepier.

During the second week, the boss introduced the concept of “miniskirt wages.” If Lisa would wear a miniskirt to work, she’d get an extra 50 cents an hour. She kept wearing pants because, EWWW!

After a few weeks of his constant whining, nagging and pleading, she finally broke down and wore a miniskirt. This made the weird, little man wildly gleeful. He thanked her profusely and then instructed her to wash the bathroom floor. He had no mop, so she had to get down on her hands and knees and scrub. This bothered the girl. Especially because he just stood there watching her. But she was raised in a strict, German Catholic, “YOU WILL OBEY ADULTS NO MATTER WHAT” kind of household. She gritted her teeth and did as she was bid.

Often times, when he’d stand too close or try to whisper something in her ear, she would share outlandish tales with her boss about how she worshipped Satan. Or how her boyfriend was violent and possessive. This was completely absurd (and untrue). But she figured instilling a bit of fear into the tiny man wouldn’t hurt — he was easily frightened.

About a month later, she went with the man to a nearby town in search of a copy machine. While in the store, the boss saw a saleswoman wearing a ribbon in her hair. He asked the young lass, “Why don’t you wear ribbons for me?”

On the way home, the boss pulled into a Wal-Mart. He told the girl he would buy her ribbons that would stay at work so when she came into the office, she could wear ribbons for him. And before she left, she’d have to take them out. It would be their “own little secret.”

That night, she told her parents what had happened. (She didn’t even mention some of the other incidents like how he tried to hold her hand while looking for office equipment or that whenever she’d go to the bathroom, he’d stand by the door and listen to her pee.) They told her she must quit.

The next day she quit. The man pressed her for a reason. She told him her boyfriend was very possessive and wanted to kill him because of the miniskirt wages and the ribbons. Being that the timid, whiney man had seen her strapping boyfriend (who was 6′2 and 180 lbs) once or twice he turned white and dropped the subject. She secretly smiled.

At the end of her two-hour stint that day, he tried to hug her. He took her hand, and like an eager 5-year old said, “I have a present for you.”

He opened his hand to reveal five sweaty M&M’s. With all the self-control she could muster, she thanked him and walked out to her waiting boyfriend. (Who wasn’t psycho, by the way.)

She found out her two-month stint in his employ was a record. No one had worked there as long for obvious reasons.

And that’s the end of this story. Tune in later to hear Bad Bosses Part 2 and 3. (Part 3 is a REAL doozy!)