You know what’s really awesome?
When you find a mess in your backyard.And then you realize upon further inspection that “Sneakashit“ (the neighbor’s dog) ripped open a bag of “something” and spread it all over YOUR yard…
And guess what that “something” is? Maxi pads. USED Maxi pads.
THAT! AREN’T! MINE!
I’m going to give that fucking dog TWO cans of chili if she comes to our house tonight! (Her owners let her run lose constantly.) I might have to find something so spicy that dog will shit fire.
Now I have to go outside and clean it up. I’m pretty sure this is the mess of the moronic, useless, and negligent white trash neighbors (aka “Sneakashit’s” family) — the ones EVERYONE in our ‘hood loathes. Oh and guess what? Once the “mom” (I use that term loosely) gave me a 20-minute monologue on her heavy periods. Well, now I have “proof” via soiled industrial-strength maxi pads. For once she wasn’t lying.
Updated: The mess is cleaned up. Apparently when people poop at their house, they feel it is VERY WRONG to flush the toilet paper. So guess where it WAS? Yes. All over my backyard. So very UN-AWESOME.
My husband has often jokingly advocated shooting the dog in the butt with a soft air pistol. Tonight he said, “I know that dog is one of God’s creatures but even God’s creatures sometime need a shot in the ass.”
I can’t do that! Besides, I’m a lousy shot. But right now? I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t tempted.
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But do you know what definitely IS awesome? All of the comments from you guys for the post on the diet pill drama. Heartfelt, compassionate and kind. THANK YOU SO MUCH. And THANK YOU to a those who shared their stories of how they were risking their health to stay thin too. After some requests I plan keep the post. (But it has been tinkered with a bit.)
