Dear Seth’s future love interests and future spouse:

I’m sure I will find you adorable, charming, and smart. I just want you to know up front — even if you are a brain surgeon who looks like a supermodel and you spend your vacations in poor countries caring for orphans? There will still be a small part of me that will probably wonder if you love my dear sweet little boy as much as I think you should.

Just know it has nothing to do with you. Its about me wondering, “who else could ever love him as much as his mommy!” I mean, he’s my ONLY baby! And I rather LOVE being his “best lady.” You may/may not understand someday when you become a parent.

And to his future spouse? I am so sorry for the way I may behave. I may get into your business because by then I may have far too much free time. You’d better hope Seth’s father doesn’t kill himself with all of the crap he eats because if that’s the case, there will be NO ONE to tell me I’m behaving like a total pain in the ass. Really! Who will keep me in check?

That is all. Oh and I hope that even if you can’t stand my crazy butt, you will still be ok with your husband visiting me. And I hope you will bite your tongue alot when you have children and I blurt out obnoxious “assvice“. I will try to fight it. But I am my father’s daughter. I stick my foot in my mouth all the time! It may worsen with age. I will probably offend you many times without meaning to. I just hope you will see that the craziness is marbled with love and respect.

Thank you.

Lisa

P.S. If he acts like a selfish jerk or doesn’t clean up after himself, I will adminster a verbal buttkicking for you. Just say the word. I work hard to raise a loving, loyal, compassionate, hardworking, intelligent man with manners who knows how to cook, clean and give compliments. For your sake and his, I hope I succeed.