Dear Danielle,

Last night we e-mailed each other and did a bit of catching up. It was so fun! You mentioned that you a mere five months from turning 21. You’re counting down the days. I had to laugh as nostalgia washed over me.

As of midnight, I turned 35.

Seems so freaking old, right? I know! I thought the same thing at 20. (I’m now considered to be of “advanced maternal age.” That made me laugh out loud just typing it!)

I know what’s ahead of you… What you’ll experience in your 20’s. I envy you all of the adventures you’ll have. You’ll finish college. You’ll embark on a career. You will travel. You will meet tons of new people. You are going to have SO much fun along the way. You may even get married and start a family.

But honestly? I’d rather be 35. I may be about 15 pounds heavier than I was at 21, (Ok. So maybe more like 20.) but I feel so much more comfortable in my skin. The perspective you earn as the years pass is such an amazing gift. Things that seemed like the end of the world at 21 or 23 don’t seem like such a hurdle now. Most of the chicks I know that are well into their 30’s? Know what they want and need. And they aren’t scared to ask for it. They have “balls.” And that’s a good thing.

You are gorgeous, smart, and have an amazing figure. But I don’t envy you the angst that comes with being in one’s 20’s — of not knowing what you are truly capable of. Of not fully knowing yourself. 

But with each passing day, you will learn. You will laugh, cry, be amazed and ponder many things. We all do those things. But life just seems more vivid and emotionally vulnerable during that decade.  You don’t know how strong you are until you’ve been through some, well… shit. Just remember that it will pass. You will emerge stronger, wiser, and ultimately more self-assured. Please keep your eyes, ears and heart open. What you learn will greatly influence your actions down the road.

I wish you well, dear cousin. And I hope you keep me updated every step of the way. I’ll be cheering for you.

Love,

Lisa