I’m sorry, you try pushing a 9.8lb baby out without making a single noise…

They need to know when to hold their tongues. I only hope that by her bad example, I will be better at it when it’s my turn. You will too, friend!

I love your insight about trying to be invisible so you wouldn’t be picked on — I think that also nails what I’ve done for so long after all the teasing I endured as a kid. Trouble was, it worked only too well — I was such a “good listener,” so compliant, and so quiet that people began to claim my words as their own (in front of me!) and leave me out of things because I had never registered with them as an individual.

My overeating was another way I kept myself invisible (and numb).

It is great that blogging is there for people like us to finally burst out of our shells and become visible — first to ourselves, and then to the wider world! Blogging as emotional healing — what a fabulous concept.

About the slouching: My mom used to be at me about my posture (”put your shoulders back”), but it never worked. Frankly, I’m more concerned with my efforts to stand straight and tall emotionally, rather than physically.

And your critic (Crabby McCrabberson!) is so way out of line. I can’t help feeling that many people like that just dish the dirt to avoid dealing with their own stuff.

Powerful post! Congrats to you for all the lessons you’ve learned the hard way — look how far you’ve come!

I had never analyzed my own slouching habit the same way that you have, but, I wonder if I do it for the same reasons? I was awkward, poor, and stuck in hand-me-downs when I was growing up, too (never a good combination if you want to avoid being bullied, especially if, right when you enter puberty, you suddenly find yourself on scholarship to the best private school in town).

Dang it, we should both stand up straight, Lisa. But not because some jerk is telling you to.

But I totally see where you’re coming from with this, and with your frustration over the relative who will not let it die. Possibly you could show them this post? Or give a summary of what you said here? Maybe just by mentioning to them that there are more important things, and even reasons behind your slouch that they dredge up every time they critique your posture, they’ll realize that it shouldn’t be their concern and to keep harping on it is really overstepping their bounds.

Don’t let anyone tell you any different - you are one tough cookie, lady!