All you need is love… (And sometimes a little Ambien)

By motherofbun December 16, 2008

Dear Sleep.

You have been an elusive little minx for quite some time now. A first you started teasing me in my 20’s here and there but now in my mid 30’s, you’ve decided to really put the screws to me. Sure you’d let me catch you for a little bit but usually only for a few broken hours throughout the course of an evening.

Once I saw a sleep doctor in hopes of success. He proposed staying away from you on purpose for several nights. The theory would be that after awhile I’d be so tired, you’d come and wash over me. That didn’t happen. In fact, I got so tired that one night I accidentally slammed my hand in the car door. What’s sad is that it took a few seconds to figure out WHY I was inadvertently tethered to the car. (My hand was still stuck in the door.) It took a few more seconds to process the “OUCH!” part.  Not good.

Oh sure, over the years, I’ve taken other meds in an effort to trap you but those left me feeling all groggy. I hear how you’ve been visiting lots of other people I know. I’ve felt like the only girl in the neighborhood who’s still not gotten her boobs. Completely frustrated, confused and utterly left out.

But the fact of the matter is… I need you. I can’t live without you. You not being in my life has caused me to be an overemotional crankypants from the netherworlds that has trouble stringing a sentence together. So I decided I was going to DO something about this little problem.

Thanks to Ambien, YOU ARE NOW MY BITCH. You are like a horny teen boy. Ambien is like the easy girl you are attracted to. Because within a few minutes of closing my eyes, you take hold of me. And you don’t let go for hours upon hours. (Ok. Maybe you aren’t like a teenage boy. I don’t think they can “last” 10 minutes, let alone 6 or 7 hours.)

But anyway… You’ve got to deal with me now — whether you like it or not. HAHAHAHA!

– Lisa

(Have been going over some old posts. Am amazed at how many times I complained about not sleeping and having migraines. Life is SO MUCH better when you get solid sleep on a regular basis. And although I’ve a script for the lowest dose possible, half a pill each night does the job. Hopefully 2009 will see me sleeping well and Ambien-free!)

This is where I pimp my recent finished projects: What did bloggers think of Positive Spin’s newest books? Check Parent Bloggers to find out. And if you still need a gift idea for that little car enthusiast in your life, check this out. There’s lots of new reviews (like for Nature’s Gate and Shop.com) and info about MomCentral’s Holiday Shopping Guide at Midwestern Mommy Reviews. Oh check out the giveaway too!  

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32 Comments

  • By Paula, December 16, 2008 @ 8:19 pm

    Ok. Be careful with Ambien. I have girlfriends who have taken it and:
    (1)shopped online without knowing until the UPS man showed up

    (2)awakened in the mornings to be surrounded by snack and candy wrappers on the bed - that friend gained 10 pounds from the nightly feedings

    (3)had MAJOR withdrawal symptoms when she tried to get off after taking for a long time

    Have you tried melatonin? That’s what I take.

    Enjoy your sleep!!!!

  • By Ree, December 16, 2008 @ 8:55 pm

    Sleep is a good thing. Glad you found something that works for you!

  • By Heather @boy, girl, pug, December 16, 2008 @ 9:36 pm

    I love me some Ambien too! Totally knocks me out!

  • By Tuesday, December 16, 2008 @ 10:22 pm

    I just love ambien, but be careful it is VERY addicting to get a good nights sleep! : )

  • By Gregg, December 16, 2008 @ 11:22 pm

    While I certainly can’t vouch for pretty much ANY of your comparisons, the sleep part DOES sound good!

  • By Carrie, December 17, 2008 @ 12:17 am

    I’m glad you’re getting some sleep Lisa!

  • By Linlee, December 17, 2008 @ 2:43 am

    Ambien is WONDERFUL! Brinnon got a few when he went to Brazil so I tried one! I loved it! Now I take his when I’ve had a rough day with Hope or just need a solid nights sleep!

  • By Sugared Harpy, December 17, 2008 @ 3:24 am

    Hooray for Ambien! I was going to suggest pharmaceuticals, as usual, but you got there all on your own. Way to go. Yes, life is better with sleep :)

  • By Traceytreasure, December 17, 2008 @ 4:45 am

    I’m so glad that you’re getting some!! ;)
    Sleep that is…..
    ;)

    Life rocks when you’re well rested. Just in time for the holidays. Hope yours are happy ones!!

    Hugs!!

  • By flutter, December 17, 2008 @ 5:57 am

    Amen.

  • By Terra, December 17, 2008 @ 3:03 pm

    That stuff works? Interesting… When I go into a “can’t sleep” time I normally try to exercise myself to death. I guess I wouldn’t be approved on something like that though since it isn’t all the time? :)

  • By Kristi, December 17, 2008 @ 4:57 pm

    You poor Kid! Luckily, I only suffer the occasional bout of insomnia, but my hubby? Ugh. All the time.

    I’m a huge fan of keeping notebooks by the bed, so I can write down whatever’s swimming around in my brain, a hot bath, lavender spritzed on the pillows, a relaxation CD or sometimes, I just read a book until I fall asleep and wake up the next morning with said book buried somewhere.

    Paperbacks are best. =)

  • By Issa, December 17, 2008 @ 5:10 pm

    I have never been a good sleeper. Basically I was an asshat to my mom as a child. At some point, I relaized not sleeping wasn’t really that normal. I heart the Ambien. We’re getting married soon, gonna have little sleeping pill babies.

  • By WickedAuntie, December 18, 2008 @ 4:42 am

    Jealous. Ambien no worky for me - at least not after the first night. That first night I take it, though - yessireebob, it’s my friend. The second night it helps a little, but the third night is the same as being drug-free. [sigh]

    So now I wish I were visiting for the holydaze - I don’t think I’ve ever met the well-rested version of you. I wonder how different you are… More fabulous than ever, I’m sure. Congrats on the glory of your newfound sleep!

  • By quinn, December 18, 2008 @ 2:46 pm

    I too have terrible insomnia. For a while I’d figured out that half an Ambien each night helped a bit. But then I’d still feel groggy the next day. I’ve recently cut the caffeine from my daily routine and that seems to have worked wonders. I don’t need to take the Ambien to get some rest. I still wake up at 3am for no reason, but I fall asleep more easily and the few hours I get seem to be much better quality… Hope the Ambien continues to work its magic for you!

  • By Zephra, December 18, 2008 @ 4:22 pm

    Ambien is the greatest drug ever created. I went 6 months with 1 to 3 hours a sleep a night. Interestingly enough it all started when my thyroid crapped out on me. Ambien brought sleep back. When I need it, I usually only take a 1/2 or sometimes 1/4 of a pill. I sleep like the dead. Thank you Ambien.

  • By Linda, December 19, 2008 @ 4:32 am

    Dear Sleep,

    Glad you and Lisa are having a rapturous reunion!

    My problem now is I’ve got my days and nights switched, so I’m writing blog posts at 3:30 a.m. and falling asleep at noon! :-(

  • By Liz@thisfullhouse, December 19, 2008 @ 1:13 pm

    Insomniac and migraine sufferer, here. I’ve tried Tylenol PM, but end up feeling all fuzzy-headed, the next morning. More than usual, I mean. Might try this, though. Good luck!

  • By Amber, December 19, 2008 @ 4:29 pm

    I have a good solution for your sleep problems: move to Canada. Seriously. I’m a terrible sleeper but whenever I come up here, I sleep like a rock because it gets so dark and stays dark until late. Even the kids have been sleeping in until 8:30 a.m. Shocking.

  • By Mrs. G., December 21, 2008 @ 5:03 am

    Sweet dreams sister.

  • By Alex Elliot, December 22, 2008 @ 1:58 am

    Glad you found something that works! Unfortunately I don’t think Ambien would take care of my sleep issues: two kids, a dog who runs in his sleep, two cats and a husband who snores.

  • By Jakki, December 22, 2008 @ 5:13 pm

    YOU ARE HILIARIOUS WITH AMBIEN BEING YOUR BITCH!

  • By debra, December 31, 2008 @ 6:07 pm

    Just stopping by today to wish you a very happy new year! May it be even better than you hope! xoxo

  • By creative-type dad, December 31, 2008 @ 8:01 pm

    Kevin Costner movies are my Ambien.

    Hope you’re holidays are going well.

  • By Dana, January 3, 2009 @ 7:11 pm

    I just wanted to stop over and wish you a happy new year. I hope all is well with you, and that you’ve gotten some rest.

  • By Lavender, March 19, 2009 @ 3:30 pm

    Can you tried lavender essential oils (not the chemical stuff that smells like lavender, but true essential oil from plants)? It does wonders. My mom has been on Ambien and basically went out of her mind. I’m sure it works for lots of folks, but please be careful.

  • By sleep, April 27, 2009 @ 8:33 pm

    I prefer all natural sleep.

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