You have been an elusive little minx for quite some time now. A first you started teasing me in my 20’s here and there but now in my mid 30’s, you’ve decided to really put the screws to me. Sure you’d let me catch you for a little bit but usually only for a few broken hours throughout the course of an evening.
Once I saw a sleep doctor in hopes of success. He proposed staying away from you on purpose for several nights. The theory would be that after awhile I’d be so tired, you’d come and wash over me. That didn’t happen. In fact, I got so tired that one night I accidentally slammed my hand in the car door. What’s sad is that it took a few seconds to figure out WHY I was inadvertently tethered to the car. (My hand was still stuck in the door.) It took a few more seconds to process the “OUCH!” part. Not good.
Oh sure, over the years, I’ve taken other meds in an effort to trap you but those left me feeling all groggy. I hear how you’ve been visiting lots of other people I know. I’ve felt like the only girl in the neighborhood who’s still not gotten her boobs. Completely frustrated, confused and utterly left out.
But the fact of the matter is… I need you. I can’t live without you. You not being in my life has caused me to be an overemotional crankypants from the netherworlds that has trouble stringing a sentence together. So I decided I was going to DO something about this little problem.
Thanks to Ambien, YOU ARE NOW MY BITCH. You are like a horny teen boy. Ambien is like the easy girl you are attracted to. Because within a few minutes of closing my eyes, you take hold of me. And you don’t let go for hours upon hours. (Ok. Maybe you aren’t like a teenage boy. I don’t think they can “last” 10 minutes, let alone 6 or 7 hours.)
But anyway… You’ve got to deal with me now — whether you like it or not. HAHAHAHA!
(Have been going over some old posts. Am amazed at how many times I complained about not sleeping and having migraines. Life is SO MUCH better when you get solid sleep on a regular basis. And although I’ve a script for the lowest dose possible, half a pill each night does the job. Hopefully 2009 will see me sleeping well and Ambien-free!)
This is where I pimp my recent finished projects: What did bloggers think of Positive Spin’s newest books? Check Parent Bloggers to find out. And if you still need a gift idea for that little car enthusiast in your life, check this out. There’s lots of new reviews (like for Nature’s Gate and Shop.com) and info about MomCentral’s Holiday Shopping Guide at Midwestern Mommy Reviews. Oh check out the giveaway too – You can check the special giveaway I published on therowingmachinedoctor.com (The Iron fitness home machine).